I wanted to start out my first new blog post with my personal testimony. There’s such a stirring of faith and hope when we hear other’s testimonies. Most importantly, it exalts Jesus and His Saving power. He truly makes beauty out of ashes and is the God of so many second chances. Through Jesus, and Jesus alone, are we made right with Daddy God. So with that being said, here we go!
I remember as a young girl talking to the Lord and praying a lot. I can honestly say that I had a relationship with Him back then and I was baptized when I was around 7 years old. I grew up in a mostly single-parent home, with an alcoholic parent who did their best to provide. There was never a lack of material things, but my emotional needs were never met or nurtured as a young girl. It was a very unhealthy and chaotic home life. Around 14 years old, I began to rebel in every way possible. I was angry, suicidal, hurt and very lost.
Now, fast-forward to the year 2013. I was 20 years old and smoking two packs of cigarettes EVERY day. I was high the majority of the time and even began to sell certain drugs for a time period. The majority of the relationships and friendships I maintained were ungodly and unhealthy. I hated myself. (Literally) The short of it – I was extremely depressed and lost and I was looking to anything and everything to meet my needs and longings that no one and nothing could satisfy. Throughout those years, I was on and off trying to seek God and even learning and walking through some deliverance. I had a hunger to know Him and for my life to be changed, but I was in so much bondage and sin, that I couldn’t seem to get free from all of these chains. I know I had a desire for a different life and I wanted God to change me. With all of that being said, this is the year God began to radically transform my life.
After God supernaturally moved me away from my toxic lifestyle and surroundings, I fully surrendered to Him. I remember one of the nights after moving away that I cried out to Him saying He could do whatever He needed to do to heal me and change my life. February 2013 was a real turning point in my life and I consider that time to be when I truly re-dedicated my life to Jesus as my Savior and LORD. Meaning, I repented of my sins (the things that were separating me from Him), and I asked Him to help me turn away from it all and turn to Him completely. I was re-baptized soon after. The day He moved me was the last day I did any drugs. That first week or two of moving I only smoked two cigarettes and each of those times, I was so disgusted by the taste that I couldn’t physically handle it. GOD DELIVERED ME!
Over time, The Lord has not only delivered me from addiction. He has delivered me from self-hatred, bitterness, resentment, fear of man, & SO MUCH MORE. (I’m telling ya, so much more)
Over the last 5 1/2 years, it’s been a real journey with Jesus – & the journey isn’t over. He is always revealing more about Himself to me and teaching me more about who I am to Him. I still mess up and ask for forgiveness – a lot. The thing is… I’m finally walking in freedom. I know my identity is IN HIM and when you know who you are and whose you are… You are totally free, to just be free!
- God can save and transform anyone. The skeptic, the druggie, the atheist, the muslim, the sex-trafficking leader. Jesus came, died and was resurrected for everyone.
- You still mess up after giving your life to Jesus and walking in RELATIONSHIP with Him.
- Jesus > religion.
- You don’t have to first clean up and then come to God. You go to God and ask Him to clean you up.
- Repentance = turning away from sin. It’s not any type of scary or bad word. Repentance brings TRUE freedom and demolishes the wall of sin separating you from The One who created you.
“And they have defeated him by the blood of the Lamb and by their testimony. And they did not love their lives so much that they were afraid to die.” – Revelation 12:11 NLT
“They defeated him through the blood of the Lamb and the bold word of their witness. They weren’t in love with themselves; they were willing to die for Christ.” Revelation 12:11 The Message//Remix
“To all who mourn in Israel, He will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for His own glory.” – Isaiah 61:3 NLT